Competitive parents: blessing or curse?

It is without doubt that everyone has come across this particular stereotype whether it was at a football match, spelling competition or merely middle school sports day. Without fail, their little darling is kitted up to the eyeballs with state of the art trainers, all new sports kit (just for the occasion) and 3 gallons of water to keep them hydrated as they limber up for that all important 100m sprint with their fellow year 8 friends. This doesn’t change as you get older alas; after attending numerous County, City and NSAA athletics competitions I grew accustom to watching the pretty girl with the long legs and pushy dad produce her very own starting blocks from her pink bag. She would of course win; receive a pat on the back and a picture with her beaming dad before collecting her certificate and being told the next rounds took place at least 5 hours away. Equally, the one who came second would get a cold stare and a ‘well that was a waste of time’ from the mother who looks so far from athletic, you begin to wonder where that child came from. 

But it goes without saying, none of these mums or dads can match up with horsey parents. There is something about equestrianism competition which brings out the worst in competitive people whether it is subtle or not so subtle. After competing in Junior BSJA for nearly 4 years, my mum and I have seen our fair share of collecting ring wars between mums, dads, grandparents, children, siblings and (worst of all) between parents of two different competitors. If something doesn’t go quite right and your 11 year old riding their string of 12.2 ponies doesn’t collect that prize money meaning you’ve just wasted £70 in entry fees, 5 hours of driving and 3 hours of waiting for your class, someone is going to get a bollocking.

I can’t pin all this stereotypical behaviour on show jumping parents alone however as it happens in all disciplines. Team selection is probably the worst thing anyone with a speck of ambition or competitiveness will ever experience, parent or child. From International, National, Inter club or Pony Club, this situation reeks of rejection and disappointment. It is gutting for everyone involved, all those years of pushing and dedication has gone to waste whilst all anyone can say is ‘there is always next year’.

Of course, not all competitive parents follow these examples with many being able to channel their will to win into simply motivating their child to do the same. Without parents like these, many children would never grow up to be successful in equestrianism or anything else for that matter but sometimes it is important to know when enough is enough.

Hours of driving, training and heartache goes into sport and this only doubles if you are an equestrian, but at the end of day you always know you have your number one fan behind you whether you win, lose or just thoroughly let yourself down.

Dedicated to the number one show jumping/eventing/polocrosse/pony club mum, thanks for being awesome Joz x